WTF Archive

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

WTF: I have been bullimic for 8 years. My mind tells me people are trying to make me fat, and purging is normal. I know all the consequences, and that I need help, but I'm not ready to stop.


5 comments:

  1. AnonymousDecember 22, 2009 at 10:37 AM

    i know what you mean, OP. getting help doesn't mean you have to stop right away though, like with anything, quitting cold turkey doesn't work. but getting help (seeing a doctor, psychiatrist, nutritionist, and even telling a friend you trust) can help ground your thoughts a bit more (you KNOW your actions are irrational but in the same way you feel like what you're doing now is the only thing that makes sense), and may help you slowly ease off it and change your mentality + habits. telling people, letting it known that you realise you have a problem, isn't as dramatic as an episode of intervention - no one will force you to do anything, and it doesn't have to be suffocating. good luck.

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  2. AnonymousDecember 22, 2009 at 5:24 PM

    I have told friends and family after I scared myself: After a 4 day fast, I had a 300 cal binge, and feared what it would do to me; so, to compensate, I made myself throw up for 45 min, then took 6 diet pills and 8 laxitives and worked out to burn 1200 cal. I cried and cried, and thought it was getting out of control. 300 cal!
    The obession dominates me... I fear fat more than I fear what I am doing to myself (and believe me, I always feel like shit). Worst of all, I killed my metabolism so much, that gaining weight is too easy. I'm fat right now! I don't want to get any worse!
    I wan't to go to a professional... but after I reach my goal.
    The purpose of my post was to understand my irrational mind a little better... because we both know how crazy our minds can get. A perspective of someone else living with it can help me understand my problem a little better.

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  3. AnonymousDecember 22, 2009 at 8:41 PM

    hey op, 10:37 here. i totally understand. i'd talk about it more with you, but i don't think this is the right place to do so...

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  4. AnonymousDecember 23, 2009 at 4:31 AM

    one of you should post a temporary hotmail account or something

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  5. AnonymousDecember 23, 2009 at 3:01 PM

    In the end, you can't quit before you're ready to quit. It's all about you. But the thing is, every day you put it off, you make it that much worse for yourself.

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